What’s really happening when you say you want something and it’s just not happening? Yeah, you know what we’re talking about. When your actions don’t support that thing (that goal) you want … Spoiler alert! Internal Conflict is at play. Let’s take a look at that together, shall we? In this episode, we’re looking at ways to combat your inner conflict (Tae-Bo anyone?). Stop being held back by your own damn self! Cue your internal Billy Blanks.
Our discussion on radical candor takes another step into the deep with the help of the book Radical Conflict (all about being a “kick-ass boss”) by Kim Scott. You’re going to get real (fun) takeaways, including some new language for talking about honesty. Know this: Rocking the boat is a good thing. The homework question for this one will give you pause. Take it.
Radical candor isn’t about spewing honest digs with reckless abandon (e.g., “Your personality rivals a wet napkin”). And it isn’t an expression coined by Bill and Ted (although it’s totally excellent). So, what is it? Well, we’re breaking down radical candor in this episode and talking about its relationship to healthy conflict. Yeah … it goes there. Listen up, because you’ll have a great question to ask yourself when the episode’s done.
Here we go … Starting 2021 looking at the concept of conflict. Ewwww … Why? Sounds hard! Want to grow? Well, time to imagine what’s on the other side of that conversation you’re avoiding. Let’s walk through it and try on a different perspective.
Calling all our math geeks! We’ve got an equation for you and the result is trust. Go figure! (Figure! Ha!) Anyway … here are the key pieces: credibility, reliability, intimacy, and self-orientation. We’re going to show you how it works with examples you can probably relate to. The equation comes from David Maister, author of The Trusted Advisor.
What’s the first thing that pops into your head when I say … ‘Personal Development?’
Uh … I said answer quick! Stop thinking so much.
Maybe one of these answers
came to you:
“It’s something other people do.”
“It’s warm and fuzzy.”
Since the pandemic made its ugly presence felt, upending life as we knew it, we’ve all experienced our fair share of emotional highs and lows (is that putting it lightly?). We’ve triumphed in our remoteness (technically speaking), but even as leaders, we’ve dwelled at times in the uncertainty of it all.
To. Be. Expected.
Now, we dare you to recognize and acknowledge how you as a leader are reacting to this new normal, and to do the same for those around you. Are you jumping the gun? Are you curled up watching reruns of Friends? Although we don’t have anything against Jennifer Aniston, we’re not betting on that strategy working for you. Knowing will be the key to your resilience and reentry into our next phase.
We make lots of decisions … like hundreds every day (even when we’re self-isolating!). And decisions mean we have choices! And choices are good, right? (Dunno, ask Sophie). In all the noise, how are you gonna get your client (and yourself!) to see the big picture (we’re talkin’ IMax—if that’s still a thing). Do they even really need to make that call right now? What are they bringing to the table? What are you bringing? Is it clear as mud? Well, maybe it’s about time to let the dust settle (so … many … metaphors!) and just chill with it. Don’t worry, Jenn and Karen make it make sense.
Wanna know a cool trick for a mindset shift during these oh-so-interesting-times? Hint: it’s not a lobotomy (much less costly and no visible scars). Pay attention to what follows the words: ‘What if…’ There are a few simple steps (no magic potions involved) to teach yourself to open yourself up to possibilities. And there’s a ripple effect here, kids … listen in … WHAT IF it’s a game changer?